Dear Ashley (me), you have to do what is best for
you sometimes. I can’t continue living my life for others. I can’t continue trying
to make everyone else happy. I can’t always listen to other’s opinions about
what is best for MY life. Grudgingly, this is a hard lesson for me to learn
because I find myself wanting to change my personality because I feel as if I irritate
others sometimes. But I’m
realizing I can only live for Ashley. I can no longer live for my family,
friends, whomever I’m dating, or anybody else that will enter my life. Maybe that
makes me inconsiderate, selfish, and all about Ashley. But right now I don’t
really care. If I wanted to cater to someone else’s emotions then I’ll have
children!! I’m not trying to sound like a b-word because I do care about others
but sometimes it becomes too much! I’m tired of looking
and feeling like the bad guy because I’m not taking somebody’s advice about my
personal situations or I’m not being sensitive enough to others emotions. But
right now it seems as if everyone is weighing their problems on my shoulders.
Then the one time I’m not available or not as sensitive as I’m expected to be I’m
no longer a good person. Ironically, when I need to lay my problems out to
others it’s irrelevant or not that important. However, I’m learning that I can
no longer lose sleep over things like that; I have to live for me. Recently, I
found writing and praying to be the best outlets. Placing ink to paper or my
heart to God is the best way for me to release my frustration. Well…. This was
a personal blog this week; but sometimes that’s what it’s all about letting the
readers know the real ME!!
Hoping your week is going great so far!!
Ashley
